Monday 4 May 2020

How to Listen

How to Listen 
by Motivational Speaker in Odisha  Bhubaneshwar Cuttack Rourkela


 (a)    Listen Attentively
The first part of Active Listening is to listen attentively. Face the speaker directly, rather than at an angle. Lean slightly forward, toward the speaker. If you are standing up, shift your weight onto the balls of your feet so that you energy projects forward. Watch the mouth and eyes of the other person closely. This tells the speaker that you are paying complete attention to what he or she is saying.
(b) Listen without Interrupting
            The second part of Active Listening is to listen without interrupting. Most people don’t really listen when another is speaking. They are so busy thinking about what they are going to say when the other person takes a breath that they seldom hear what the other person is really saying.
            Whenever a speaker senses that the listener is just waiting for a chance to jump in, or that the other person’s thoughts are somewhere else, perhaps busily preparing a response, the speaker feels that the other person is tuned to him or her and to what he or she is saying, the speaker feels more valuable. So listen patiently, listen calmly, listen as if there was nothing else in the world that you would rather hear what this person is saying, for as long as this person takes to say it.

(c) Pause before Replying
            The 3rd part of Active Listening is to pause before replying. When a speaker finishes speaking, pause for 3 to 5 seconds before saying anything. In this pause, 3 things will happen.
            First, you will actually hear the other person better. When you allow a few seconds for the other person’s remarks to sink in, you actually understand the other person more completely.
            Second, when you pause, you avoid interrupting the other person if he or she has just paused to collect his or her thoughts. When you pause for 3-5 seconds, you give the other person an opportunity to continue rather than cutting him or her off. There are few things more irritating or insulting than being interrupted in the middle of a thought or in the middle of a sentence.
            Third, when you pause before replying, you make it clear, with your silence, that you consider what has just been said to be important. You are giving it careful consideration. It is a great compliment to the speaker to have the listener sit quietly and think about his or her remarks before responding, whatever the response may be.

(d) Question for Clarification
            The fourth part of Good Listening is to question for clarification. Ask questions to ensure that you fully understand what the other person has said. When you assume you understand, without checking, you very often don’t understand what the other person has said at all, This is especially true in conversation between men and women.
            Perhaps the best way to expand way to expand a conversation, increase your opportunities to listen and improve your understanding is by the use of an open minded questions.
            An open ended question is one that cannot be answered with a “yes” or a “no”. Open ended questions begin with. The additional benefit of asking open ended questions is that you get more opportunity to listen, more opportunity to build trust, and more opportunity to fully understand what the other person is thinking and feeling.
(e) Feed back the Person’s words to Him -
            The fifth part of Active Listening is to feedback the person’s words to him. Summary what he  has said in your own words. When you summarise and feed it back, you compliment the speaker. You show how closely you have been paying attention. Infact, until you can feedback a speaker’s meaning correctly, you have not really understood.
                        Try this when another person finishes speaking. Pause for 3 to 5 seconds and then say, “Let me make sure that I understand you. What you are saying is this.” And then go and to feed it back in your own words.
                        Whenever you make the effort to listen so attentively that you are able to feed  a person’s words back to him or her, you increase your ability  to communicate. You build greater trust between the two of you. You build higher self-esteem in the other person, and you develop self-discipline in yourself.

Remember, you never learn anything while your mouth is open. When you are speaking, all you can say is what you already know. But when you are listening, it is possible for you to learn something new.


Shikhar Prajapati
(Motivational Speaker and Corporate Trainer)




Shikhar Prajapati is  India’s favourite Motivational Speaker and Corporate Trainer who has successfully trained more than 7 lakh people since 2001.

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